Welcome to Costco. I love you.

Look, this website isn't FINISHED yet. Don't be mad at me for greeting you with a quote from Idiocracy (2006). There are two pieces I'm working on right now for this page: In Defense of Watching the Movie First, and Top 10 People I'd Let Babysit my Child. I have a third in mind, and no, I'm not telling. Remember to use the right slow gin if you want the yogurt effect.